(Nordquist)

Trees! Trees! Trees! light up from here to Kwanzaa
But I'll sell you a tree that makes ‘em all look like bonsai!
It's genetically altered to grow like a demon
Arboretus Rex of the plant museum

Titanic Tannenbaum
Titanic Tannenbaum

Douglas Fir looks awfully weak and scrawny
One small blip beneath this green tsunami
Your friends can deck their halls like they're some kind of rock star
But they will stand in awe before your Christmas Death Star

Titanic Tannenbaum
Titanic Tannenbaum
No one has ever seen
This tall an evergreen
Goliath of the Tannenbaums!
Titanic! Titanic! Titanic! Titanic!
Titanic Tannenbaum

If we can send a robot
To plant a flag on Mars
Why can't we build a Christmas tree
That reaches for the stars?

A tree for all mankind
Of epic scope and scale
It never bends before the wind
It's much too big to fail

It stands so bright and beautiful
It brings you to your knees
The snowmen and the shepherds kneel
Before the King of Trees

Blazing like a bonfire
Twenty stories tall
Its lights are lit by hydrogen
The brightest flames of all

And the more you learn about it
The more you'll want to say
"I've got the Christmas tree
That's making history
That's blowing other trees away!"

Titanic Tannenbaum
Titanic Tannenbaum
Yes, it grows so high
You could rule the sky
The Hindenburg of Tannenbaums
Titanic! Gigantic! Dynamic! Romantic!

Titanic Tannenbaum
Titanic Tannenbaum
No one has ever seen
As huge an evergreen
Atomic bomb of Tannenbaums
Titanic! Gigantic! Volcanic! Don't panic!
Titanic Tannenbaum

Titanic Tannenbaum, ahh
Titanic Tannenbaum, ah

They plant the tree Titanic
To trail across the sky
Both sides of the Atlantic
It's climbing very high
It caused a lot of panic
It caused a lot of fear
It brought a Merry Christmas
And a happy happy year